Fins on screen

Okay, so my Netflix “recommended for you” list comes up with all sorts of posters featuring the sharp-toothed gaping mouths of sharks, which means the company knows my weakness. I watch shark movies. Most of these so-called movies go directly to streaming services, so I find extra allure when a project opens in theaters, especially with a title like Hot Springs Shark Attack!. Oh yes, and the poster—one of those giant, tooth filled mouths gaping as it rises to eat a naked guy in a tub. Sadly, I think that image ranks as my favorite part of the project. That, and a 70-minute run time. Granted filmmaker Morihito Inoe aims at producing a stupid film for the genre “so bad it’s funny.” And yes, amid the plastic sharks, rigid performances, and hideous effects, I giggled now and then. I guess by shark movie standards, this rates as decent. Plus, Hot Springs Shark Attack! won the Tokyo International Shark Film Festival, but I suspect most of the entries find a better home at the Razzie rather than Academy Awards.

                               ***

          Among my shark adventures prior to the hot springs attack, I checked out a couple of other projects because my definition of summer includes at least one shark project, and I need no special 50^th anniversary release date for Jaws to celebrate fins on screen. Earlier this year, an ad showing a plethora of fins led me to the Dr. Odyssey television show’s second season, where attacks come in multiple forms as a cruise ship crew goes overboard to help survivors in a lifeboat. The show focuses on a medical team too brilliant to believe but qualifying as guilty pleasure viewing. Co-creator Ryan Murphy presents The Love Boat on steroids drenched with tidal waves of gleeful excess. What else to say about voyages that feature all those sharks plus a penile fracture, a venereal disease outbreak, a rubber duckie invasion, and angry orcas. So bad it’s good (or at least fun), the series’ cast members Joshua Jackson, Pippa Soo, and Don Johnson say their lines like characters who actually believe what they see and do. The show also suits my summer vacation plans of a cruise that ends in Venice. This led to another fin-oriented

adventure when I googled the city’s name and came up with 2008’s Shark in Venice. The fact that Stephen Baldwin rather than his brother Alec stars hints at the project’s quality. One could claim that the film bears a useful message suggesting that canal admirers should stay out of the water. I sort of figured that one out even before watching the movie or visiting Venice, a view influenced more by sanitation than Galeophobia, the official name for fear of sharks.  I may not want to meet a shark in Venice or a hot spring or any place else, but I still find it hard to resist those fins on screen.